I Am Not Designed For Online Learning
I do not know where to really start with this. A lot has happened between the last editorial and now. People have disappointed me, stressors at home grew, stressors involving class grew even though I asked one of my managers to give me a temporary leave of absence till classes were over to give me more time to work on homework. I have learned a lot of things these last few weeks, but unfortunately none of it was in my classes.
Zoom classes are just not the same. My mind wonders way too much in zoom classes. I can zone out much easier than I can with in–person classes. It is a lot easier to get distracted and unmotivated since I am working on things at home in my bedroom. I tell myself I can put on a movie and work on homework, but then I end up just watching the movie. I tell myself that after I finish homework, I can watch an episode of a television show, but one episode turns into six episodes and nothing getting done. I tell myself that a half hour nap will help me focus again, but that half hour nap turns into a four-hour nap. I am stuck in a rut that no matter how much I try to pull myself out of it, I fall deeper and
deeper into it.
As a chronic insomniac and migraine sufferer, I have really struggled this semester. I cannot seem to get enough sleep, but at the same time I am sleeping way too much. The amount of sleep I get dictates if I end up with a migraine or not, but then add in all the stressors I must deal with, I have been lucky to go at least every other day without a small headache or migraine. All this time that I must spend looking at a computer screen probably is not great for my eyes or my migraines. I have gotten to the point of having to use eye drops to stop my eyes from burning. I cannot wait for a well-deserved break from electronics. I have a feeling that after this semester I will not be looking at my computer for a few weeks, and I am welcoming the technology break.
This might come off like I am complaining (I am, but with reason), but I was not designed for online learning. Being in person gives me more chances to understand what is going and to speak up more than zoom classes. I pay more attention to in person classes. Zoom classes just do not work very well for me. My desk chair used to be comfortable, but now I dread having to sit in it for longer than an hour at a time. Unfortunately for me, most of my classes are more than an hour long and with the extra amount of work outside of classes on top of everything else, I am always sitting on this desk chair. I miss walking around campus when I need a break from things. I do not think I will ever improve as an online learning student.
“Rose” by Telltale
“Very Long List” by Northbound
“Wonder” by Shawn Mendes
“Happiness” by McFly
“One Little Lie” by Simple Creatures
“It’s Okay to Be Me” by Sincerely, Me
“Let Them Go” by Divided Minds