This semester is not going very well for me. I feel like every time I think I have something done, something happens that I end up starting it over because I did not like how I did something or something happens that I just cannot complete my homework. Between working two different jobs every other weekend, my internet being weird, the stress migraines, and family issues, I just cannot keep up with anything. I have been drinking way too much caffeine (which, if you know me, there is no such thing as too much caffeine) and getting very little sleep. I also just cannot focus at home. I have way too many distractions and if I need a break, I cannot just walk around campus to unwind. My dogs distract me way too easily, and my family, despite the many, many notes leading to my bedroom door saying I am in class or studying, always seem to need something when I am busy. And I never thought I would say this, but I miss the constant human interaction I get on campus (shocking, I know).
I try to give myself breaks in between all the homework and classes. I try to do something to help me
unwind and give my brain a breather. Watching something on Netflix or television helps for a little while, and then the sudden thoughts of, “Are you sure you’ll have enough time to do that tomorrow,” “Are you sure you did that correctly,” and my personal favorite, “You are never going to catch up because of this,” enter my brain and it is back to the non-stop homework. Although I am constantly doing homework and studying, my grades are still suffering. Maybe it is because I am not made to be taking a science course when I barely passed Biology in high school. Or maybe it is the thought of “I’ll look back over that tomorrow,” and then something happening preventing me from going back to look at things. Maybe it is the fact I am working two different jobs on the weekends that pull me away from getting things done. Whatever it is, though, has me in a slight panic. I am thinking it is the mix of craziness that is my life that is keeping me from being the good student I usually am.
Luckily when I start really stressing out over things because my racing mind starts up, my dog calms me down, and my amazing friends talk me off the ledge of dropping out. Afterall, I am a senior this year and it would be ridiculous if I were to drop out because of the insanity of this year. I hope they know just how much it means to me that they check in on me and convince me that I can improve my grades (even if they do not know they do this).
Like I said, though, this semester is not going very well for me. Please send me photos of animals.
“Edge of Great” Julie and The Phantoms Soundtrack
“god save me, but don’t drown me out” YungBlud
“forget me too” Machine Gun Kelly ft. Halsey
“Boys Will Be Boys” Dua Lipa
“Are You Tired?” ROSE